Abhanga 2825
Even someone who honestly confesses every failure and feels unworthy of anyone's gaze can still ask for and receive God's acceptance.
The verse
पापा नाहीं पार दुःखाचे डोंगर । जालों ये भूमीसी ओझें ॥१॥
नर नारी सकळ उत्तम चांडाळ । न पाहाती माझें मुख ॥ध्रु.॥
निंदा द्वेष घात विश्वासीं व्यभिचार । आणीक सांगों किती काय ॥२॥
पितृवचन घडली अवज्ञा अविचार। कुटिल कचर वादी निंद्य ॥३॥
भुतदया उपकार नाहीं शब्दा धीर । विषयीं लंपट हीन ॥४॥
तुका म्हणे सरतें करा पांडुरंगीं । शरण आलों मायबापा ॥५॥
Literal translation
Pāpā nāhī pāra duḥkhāñce ḍōngara — no end topāpa—ḍōngara(mountains) ofduḥkha; jālōm ye bhūmīsī ojhe — I have become this earth'sojhe(burden). Nara nārī sakaḷa uttama chāṇḍāḷa — men, women — all, theuttama(best) andchāṇḍāḷa(worst, untouchable); na pāhāti mājhe mukha — do not look at my face. Nindā dveṣa ghāta viśvāsīm vyabhichāra — slander, hatred,ghāta(betrayal, murder),viśvāsīm vyabhichāra(adultery-with-the-trusted); āṇika sāngō kitī kāya — and how much else shall I say? Pitr-vachana ghaḍalī avajñā avichāra — father's-word — I committedavajñā(disobedience, contempt) byavichāra(un-thinking); kuṭila kachara vādī nindya — (I am)kuṭila(crooked),kachara(refuse, useless-waste),vādī(disputatious),nindya(condemnable). Bhūta-dayā upakāra nāhī śabdā dhīra — nobhūta-dayā(creature-compassion), noupakāra(favor-doing), nośabdā dhīra(firm-control-of-speech); viṣayīm lampaṭa hīna — (I am)lampaṭa(greedy) for sense-objects,hīna(lowly). Tukā says: saratē karā Pāṇḍurangī — make mesaratē(qualified, having-standing) at Pāṇḍurangī; śaraṇa ālōm māyabāpā — I have come for refuge, mother-father.
What it means
A 5-verse extreme-pāpī-confession verse. Pāpā nāhī pāra duḥkhāñce ḍōngara — jālōm ye bhūmīsī ojhe — no end to pāpa — mountains of duḥkha — I have become this earth's burden. The opening: I am the earth's burden. The self-naming is total.
The dhrūpada: nara nārī sakaḷa uttama chāṇḍāḷa — na pāhāti mājhe mukha — all men, women, both best and worst — don't look at my face. Even the chāṇḍāḷa (untouchable-rank) won't-look-at-my-face. The social-isolation is total.
The second verse lists shameful-acts: nindā (slander), dveṣa (hatred), ghāta (betrayal, perhaps murder), viśvāsīm vyabhichāra (adultery-with-the-trusted). And āṇika sāngō kitī kāya — and how much more shall I say? The list is not exhaustive.
The third verse: pitr-vachana ghaḍalī avajñā avichāra — kuṭila kachara vādī nindya — father's-word — I committed disobedience un-thinkingly — I am crooked, refuse, disputatious, condemnable. The four-fold self-naming: crooked, refuse, disputatious, condemnable.
The fourth verse: bhūta-dayā upakāra nāhī śabdā dhīra — viṣayīm lampaṭa hīna — no creature-compassion, no upakāra (helpful-action), no firm-control-of-speech; greedy of sense-objects, lowly. The list of what's-not-present: bhūta-dayā, upakāra, śabdā-dhīra. And what's-present: viṣaya-lampaṭa, hīna.
The close: saratē karā Pāṇḍurangī — śaraṇa ālōm māyabāpā — make me saratē (qualified, valid) at Pāṇḍurangī — I have come for refuge, mother-father. The petition: despite all-of-the-above, make-me-saratē (give-me-standing) at Pāṇḍurangī. The bhakta-claim: the Lord can make even this earth's-burden saratē at his feet.
For someone today
A useful extreme-confession-petition prayer. No end to pāpa — mountains of duḥkha — I have become this earth's burden. All men and women, best and worst, won't look at my face. Slander, hatred, betrayal, adultery with the trusted — and how much else shall I say? I disobeyed my father's word; I am crooked, refuse, disputatious, condemnable. No creature-compassion, no upakāra, no firm-speech; greedy of sense-objects, lowly. Make me saratē at Pāṇḍurangī — I have come for refuge, mother-father. The verse permits total honest-confession — none of the self-naming is softened. And the petition asks for saratē (standing-validity) at Pāṇḍurangī — the bhakti-claim that even this is possible. (Compare 2787's Ajāmīḷa-Bhillī-Kuṇṭanī-Vālmīka — the same democratization-by-redemption.)
Where this applies
- When you feel weighed down by your own past mistakes and believe you're beyond help
- When shame makes you want to hide because you think others would judge you if they knew the truth
- When you need to make an honest, unflinching confession instead of a polished, partial one
- When you doubt whether someone this flawed could still be accepted or loved