Abhanga 2983
Genuine grief can turn into bitter protest against God himself, accusing him openly of shattering the household without holding back the anger.
The verse
बरा रे निर्गुणा नष्ट नारायणा । घरबुडवणा भेटलासी ॥१॥
एके घरीं कोणी कोणासी न धरी । ऐसी अपरांपरी केली आम्हां ॥२॥
कान्हा म्हणे कां रे निःकाम देखिलें । म्हणोनि मना आलें करितोसी ॥३॥
Literal translation
Barā re nirguṇā naṣṭa Nārāyaṇā — good (it is) —nirguṇa(formless),naṣṭa(cruel, destroyer) Nārāyaṇa; ghara-buḍavaṇā bhēṭalāsī — ghara-buḍavaṇā(house-sinker, household-destroyer) — you have met (us). Eke gharī kōṇī kōṇāsī na dharī — in oneghara, no-one keeps anyone; aisī aparāmparī kelī āmhām — suchaparāmpari(extreme rare-and-exceptional thing) you have done to us. Kānhā mhaṇe kām re niḥkāma dekhile — Kānhā says: why did you see (us) asniḥkāma(desire-less, weak); mhaṇōnī manā āle karitōsī — that (this thing) came-to-your-mind to do?
What it means
A striking 3-verse protest-verse signed by Kānhā. Part of the lament-cluster (2977-2987).
Verse 1: Barā re nirguṇā naṣṭa Nārāyaṇā — ghara-buḍavaṇā bhēṭalāsī — good (sarcastic), nirguṇa naṣṭa Nārāyaṇa — house-destroyer — you've-met-(us). The sarcastic-bitter-opening: the Lord-is-called nirguṇa-and-naṣṭa (cruel) — and ghara-buḍavaṇā (one-who-destroys-households). The bhakta-brother addresses-the-Lord-with-this-painful-title.
Eke gharī kōṇī kōṇāsī na dharī — aisī aparāmpari kelī āmhām — in one house, no-one keeps anyone — such aparāmpari you've-done-to-us. The lament: in our-one-house, no-one is keeping-anyone-anymore (the family-is-broken-by-Tukārām's-departure). Aparāmpari — extreme, rare, exceptional — you've-done-this-unique-thing to-us.
Close: Kānhā mhaṇe kām re niḥkāma dekhile — mhaṇōnī manā āle karitōsī — Kānhā says: why did you see (us) as niḥkāma — that (this) came to mind to-do? The protest: did-you-see-us-as-weak (niḥkāma = without-desire-or-power), and-therefore-decided-this?
For someone today
This is a bitter, raw protest against God, spoken by Kānhā. 'Fine, then,' he says, 'formless, cruel Nārāyaṇa — a household-destroyer is what I've met in you.' In our one home, no one holds onto anyone anymore — that is the extraordinary, terrible thing you have done to us. Kānhā asks: was it because you saw us as weak and powerless that this idea came into your mind? The verse gives voice to a devotee's bitter protest — calling God cruel, accusing him of breaking the household apart, and wondering openly whether it happened because he saw the family as too weak to resist.
मराठी: हा कान्हा यांनी उच्चारलेला एक कडवट, रोखठोक निषेधाचा अभंग आहे. ते म्हणतात, 'बरं झालं, निर्गुण, निष्ठुर नारायणा — तू आम्हाला घरबुडवणाच भेटलास.' आमच्या एका घरात आता कोणी कोणाला धरून ठेवत नाही — असे विलक्षण, भयंकर काम तू आमच्याशी केलेस. कान्हा विचारतात — आम्ही तुला निःकाम, दुर्बळ दिसलो म्हणून हे तुझ्या मनात आले का? हा अभंग भक्ताच्या कडवट निषेधाला वाट करून देतो — देवाला निष्ठुर म्हणणे, त्याने घर उद्ध्वस्त केल्याचा आरोप करणे, आणि हे उघडपणे विचारणे की आम्ही दुर्बळ दिसलो म्हणूनच त्याने असे केले का.
Where this applies
- When your grief is so raw that you want to shout accusations at God instead of quietly accepting a loss
- When your family has been broken apart by death and you feel the household will never be whole again
- When you wonder bitterly whether you were singled out because you seemed weak or powerless
- When you need permission to voice anger at the Divine as an honest part of devotion