Abhanga 3563
Overstepping out of closeness deserves patient teaching rather than harsh words, the way a mother gently corrects a child who reaches for fire without knowing it burns.
The verse
नये ऐसें बोलों कठिण उत्तरें । सलगी लेंकुरें केली पुढें ॥१॥
अपराध कीजे घडला तो क्षमा । सिकवा उत्तमा आमुचिया॥ध्रु.॥
धरूं धावें आगी पोळलें तें नेणे । ओढिलिया होणें माते बाळा ॥२॥
तुका म्हणे फार ज्याचा जार त्यासी । प्रवीण येविशीं असा तुम्ही ॥३॥
Literal translation
Naye aisē bōlōm kaṭhiṇa uttare — don't speak such hard uttara; salagī lemkurē kelī puḍhe — (your) child took familiarity before. Aparādha kīje ghaḍalā tō kṣamā — forgive the aparādha that occurred; sikavā uttamā āmuchiyā — teach good-things to us. Dharūm dhāve āgī pōḷale te neṇe — (child) runs to grab fire, doesn't know it burns; ōḍhiliyā hōṇe māte bāḷā — handling falls to mother-and-child. Tukā mhaṇe phāra jyācā jāra tyāsī — Tukā says: many have strong jāra; pravīṇa yeviśīm asā tumhī — you are pravīṇa in this matter.
What it means
A 3-verse mother-child plea: don't-speak-such-hard-uttara; the-child-took-familiarity-with-you, pardon-the-aparādha, teach-good-things; the-child-runs-into-fire-not-knowing-it-burns; the-mother-handles-the-child; you-are-pravīṇa-in-handling-many-like-this. The mother-child idiom dissolves the offence into kinship-pedagogy.
For someone today
Tukaram asks God not to speak harsh words to him, explaining that any overfamiliarity or boldness he showed came only because he already felt close, like a child does with a parent. He asks forgiveness for whatever wrong he's done and asks instead to be taught what's right. He compares himself to a small child who reaches for fire without knowing it burns, someone who simply doesn't yet understand the danger, and says that handling such a child is naturally a mother's task. He closes by saying that many people are just as stubborn or willful as he is, and trusts that God is skilled at handling exactly this kind of person.
मराठी: तुकाराम देवाला विनंती करतात की माझ्याशी कठोर शब्दांत बोलू नकोस, कारण मी जी काही सलगी किंवा धाडस दाखवले ते केवळ आधीच जवळीक वाटत होती म्हणूनच, जसे एखादे मूल आई-वडिलांशी वागते तसे. घडलेल्या चुकीबद्दल क्षमा माग, आणि त्याऐवजी योग्य ते शिकव, अशी ते विनंती करतात. स्वतःची तुलना ते एका लहान मुलाशी करतात जे आग धरायला जाते कारण ती जाळते हे त्याला माहीतच नसते, आणि अशा मुलाला सांभाळणे हे आईचेच काम असते, असे ते म्हणतात. शेवटी ते सांगतात की माझ्यासारखे हट्टी किंवा अवखळ अनेकजण असतात, आणि अशा माणसांना सांभाळण्यात देव कुशल आहे, असा विश्वास ते व्यक्त करतात.
Where this applies
- When you've overstepped with someone close to you and hope for understanding rather than harsh punishment
- When you realize you acted out of ignorance, like a child reaching for fire, rather than real malice
- When you're seeking gentle correction and guidance instead of blame after making a mistake
- When you trust that someone experienced with people's flaws will handle your missteps with patience