Abhanga 22
After a long innocent stretch, things become uncontainable. The discipline shifts from holding-back to letting the inevitable surge through cleanly.
The verse
आजिवरी तुम्हां आम्हां नेणपण । कौतुकें खेळणें संग होता ॥१॥ आतां अनावर जालें अगुणाची । करूं नये तें चि करीं सुखें ॥२॥ तुका म्हणे आतां बुडविलीं दोन्ही । कुळें एक मनीं नारायण ॥३॥
(Source: transliteral.org Sant Tukaram Gatha, abhang 22. Sixteenth in 0007-0025+ gopī-arc.)
Literal translation
English: Until today there had been innocence — you and I, with our wonder, in playing-companionship. Now it has become uncontainable, this aguṇa thing — what should not be done, that I now do gladly. Tuka says: I have drowned both my lineages; in the mind, one — Narayana.
मराठी (आधुनिक): आजपर्यंत आपल्यात नेणपण होतं — कौतुकाने खेळ-संगत होती. आता अनावर झालंय हे अगुणाचं — जे करू नये तेच मी सुखाने करते आहे. तुकाराम म्हणतात — दोन्ही कुळं बुडवली; मनात एकच — नारायण.
Word-by-word gloss
| Marathi | Meaning |
|---|---|
| आजिवरी | until today, until now |
| तुम्हां आम्हां नेणपण | "you-and-we (had) innocence / not-knowing" |
| कौतुकें खेळणें संग | "with curiosity/wonder, the playing-companionship was happening" |
| आतां अनावर जालें | "now it has become uncontainable" |
| अगुणाची | "of (something) without-quality / un-categorizable" |
| करूं नये तें चि करीं सुखें | "what should not be done, that very thing I now do gladly" |
| बुडविलीं दोन्ही कुळें | "I have drowned both lineages" (parents' and husband's) |
| एक मनीं नारायण | "in the mind, one (thing): Narayana" |
What it means
This abhang names the transition out of innocence. Until now (आजिवरी), the speaker and the addressed-women had been together in नेणपण — innocent not-knowing — playing together with wonder (कौतुकें). That phase is over. आतां अनावर जालें — now it has become uncontainable. The thing she is now experiencing is अगुण — beyond-quality, beyond the categories of guṇa (the threefold sattva-rajas-tamas of classical Indian philosophy). It is not bad or good in the previous frame; it is outside the frame. [T]
The closing image is striking: बुडविलीं दोन्ही कुळें — both lineages drowned. In Marathi-Hindu social structure, a married woman has two kuls — her parental and her husband's. The drowning of both is the loss of all inherited identity. What remains is एक मनीं नारायण — one in the mind, Narayana. The mind has been emptied of inherited content, and one thing has come to occupy it. [T]
For someone today
English: This is the verse for the moment when something you've been gently practicing for a long time suddenly becomes uncontainable. The years of innocent companionship with the practice — the gentle play, the wondering exploration — give way to a phase where the practice runs through you whether you wanted it to or not. The temptation is to call this breakdown, regression, getting-out-of-control. Tukaram's reframe: this is ripening. The phase you were in had a natural end-point; the surge is what comes next. The discipline shifts from holding-back to letting it move through cleanly without the old restraints.
The phrase करूं नये तें चि करीं सुखें — what should not be done, that very thing I now do gladly — is uncomfortable to read because it sounds like license. It is not license; it is the recognition that the categories of "should and should-not" belonged to the previous (innocent) phase, and the present phase has gone past them. The thing she is doing was should-not in the previous frame; in the current frame the previous frame no longer applies. The honesty is to name this without pretending the previous categories still organize her.
मराठी: ही ओवी अशा क्षणासाठी आहे जेव्हा खूप वेळ हलक्या हाताने केलेली एखादी गोष्ट अचानक अनावर होते. साधनेबरोबर असलेलं वर्षांचं नेणपणाचं संगत — सौम्य खेळ, चकित अन्वेषण — आता अशा टप्प्यात बदलतं जिथे साधना तुमच्यातून वाहतेच, तुम्ही पाहिजे की नको हे न विचारता. मोह असतो — याला breakdown, regression, हाताबाहेर जाणं म्हणण्याचा. तुकाराम पुनर्व्याख्या देतात: हे पिकणं आहे. आधीच्या टप्प्याचा नैसर्गिक शेवट होता; surge तेच आहे जे पुढे येतं. शिस्त बदलते — रोखण्यापासून ते स्वच्छपणे आत वाहू देण्याकडे.
करूं नये तें चि करीं सुखें — जे करू नये तेच आता आनंदाने करते — हे वाचायला अस्वस्थ वाटतं कारण license सारखं वाटतं. ते license नाही; ते ओळख आहे की "करावं-न करावं" च्या categories आधीच्या (नेणपणाच्या) टप्प्याच्या होत्या, आणि आताचा टप्पा त्यांच्याबाहेर गेला आहे. ती जे करते आहे ते आधीच्या frame मध्ये करू नये होतं; सध्याच्या frame मध्ये आधीचा frame लागूच पडत नाही. प्रामाणिकपणा हाच की हे ढोंग न करता मान्य करायचं.
Where this applies
- When a long innocent practice has matured into something uncontainable. Trust the surge. It is ripening, not breakdown. The discipline now is letting it through cleanly.
- When you find yourself doing what you would have called wrong six months ago. The categories may have changed. Don't assume failure; ask whether the previous frame still applies.
- When inheritance from both kul has been let go. What remains is one thing in mind. Trust the singularity.