Abhanga 566
Even deep devotion did not erase Tukaram's real suffering under poverty, and he gave that raw anger and despair full honest voice instead of hiding it.
The verse
मज चि भोंवता केला येणें जोग । काय याचा भोग अंतरला ॥१॥ चालोनियां घरा सर्व सुखें येती । माझी तों फजीती चुके चि ना ॥ध्रु.॥ कोणाची बाईल होऊनियां वोढूं । संवसारीं काढूं आपदा किती ॥२॥ काय तरी देऊं तोडितील पोरें । मरतीं तरी बरें होतें आतां ॥३॥ कांहीं नेदी वांचों धोवियेलें घर । सारवावया ढोर शेण नाहीं ॥४॥ तुका म्हणे रांड न करितां विचार । वाहुनियां भार कुंथे माथां ॥५॥
Literal translation
For me — jōga — what bhōga missed? Sukha walking-to-ghara — fajīta doesn't end. Whose bāīla — vōḍhūm — samsāra's āpadā — how many? What to give — pōrē tear — if died — better now. Dhōvīyēlēm ghara — doesn't survive — sārava — no ḍhōra-śēṇa. Tuka says: rāṇḍa — without thinking — bhāra — kumthē māthām.
मराठी: मज चि भोंवता केला येणें जोग — काय याचा भोग अंतरला?. चालोनियां घरा सर्व सुखें येती — माझी तों फजीती चुके चि ना. कोणाची बाईल होऊनियां वोढूं — संवसारीं काढूं आपदा किती?. काय तरी देऊं तोडितील पोरें — मरतीं तरी बरें होतें आतां. कांहीं नेदी वांचों धोवियेलें घर — सारवावया ढोर शेण नाहीं. तुकाराम म्हणतां — रांड न करितां विचार — वाहुनियां भार कुंथे माथां.
Word-by-word gloss
| Marathi | Meaning |
|---|---|
| मज चि भोंवता केला येणें जोग | "for me — jōga" |
| काय याचा भोग अंतरला | "what bhōga missed?" |
| चालोनियां घरा सर्व सुखें येती | "sukha — to ghara — walking" |
| माझी तों फजीती चुके चि ना | "fajīta — doesn't end" |
| कोणाची बाईल होऊनियां वोढूं | "whose bāīla — vōḍhūm" |
| संवसारीं काढूं आपदा किती | "samsāra's āpadā — how many?" |
| काय तरी देऊं तोडितील पोरें | "what to give — pōrē tear" |
| मरतीं तरी बरें होतें आतां | "if died — better now" |
| कांहीं नेदी वांचों धोवियेलें घर | "dhōvīyēlēm ghara — doesn't survive" |
| सारवावया ढोर शेण नाहीं | "sārava — no ḍhōra-śēṇa" |
| रांड न करितां विचार | "rāṇḍa — without thinking" |
| वाहुनियां भार कुंथे माथां | "bhāra — kumthē māthām" |
What it means
A household-collapse-protest-rāṇḍa-doesn't-think abhang. Biographical-poverty-distress register. Six claims:
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मज चि भोंवता केला येणें जोग — काय याचा भोग अंतरला — for me — jōga — what bhōga missed? The opening-bitter-protest: for me only — He has done thisjōga(contrivance, yoga-arrangement); whatbhōga(enjoyment) of His wasamtaralā(missed, set-apart)? Why-did-this-happen-only-to-me; what-of-His-bhōga-is-missed? Bitter-irony.
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चालोनियां घरा सर्व सुखें येती — माझी तों फजीती चुके चि ना — sukha walking to ghara — fajīta doesn't end. The contrast-claim: sukha (good-things) walks-to-the-(other-people's)-house;but my fajīta (humiliation, public-shame) doesn't cukē (end, miss).Others-get-sukha-I-get-fajīta.
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कोणाची बाईल होऊनियां वोढूं — संवसारीं काढूं आपदा किती — whose bāīla — vōḍhūm — samsāra's āpadā how many? The desperate-question: whosebāīla(wife) do I become andvōḍhūm(pull-through, drag-along)?; thesamsāra'sāpadā(calamities) — how many to kāḍhūm (extract, pull through)?Endless-domestic-calamity.
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काय तरी देऊं तोडितील पोरें — मरतीं तरी बरें होतें आतां — what to give — pōrē tear — if died — better now. The darker-protest: what to give? — thepōrē(children, kids) willtōḍitīla(tear, break); if they died — it would bebarē(better) now. Bitter-darker-protest about poverty's-effect-on-children.
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कांहीं नेदी वांचों धोवियेलें घर — सारवावया ढोर शेण नाहीं — dhōvīyēlēm ghara — doesn't survive — sārava — no ḍhōra-śēṇa. The ultimate-poverty-image: thedhōvīyēlēm ghara(washed-clean house) doesn't survive;for sārava (smearing-the-floor with cow-dung, the basic household-cleaning ritual)— noḍhōra-śēṇa(cattle-dung). No-cattle-dung-for-floor-smearing = ultimate-poverty. (In village-Maharashtra, smearing-the-floor with diluted-cow-dung is a daily-cleaning-ritual; no-cattle-dung means no-cattle, no-ritual-cleansing — the absolute-bottom of poverty.)
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तुका म्हणे रांड न करितां विचार — वाहुनियां भार कुंथे माथां — Tuka says: rāṇḍa — without thinking — bhāra — kumthē māthām. The closing-domestic-image: Tuka says: therāṇḍa(wife / woman) —na karitām vicāra(without thinking, without considering); vāhuniyām bhāra (carrying the load);kumthē māthām(groans on her head). Wife-carries-load-without-thinking-groans-on-head. Image of patient-domestic-suffering.
[T]
For someone today
This is one of Tukaram's rawest, most honest confessions of poverty and despair. He asks bitterly why this hardship has fallen only on him, as if some enjoyment he never even had was somehow taken away. He watches good fortune walk into other people's homes while his own humiliation never lets up. He wonders, in desperation, whose wife he has dragged into this endless string of household disasters, and how many more calamities there are still to survive. In his darkest moment he even says it would be better if his starving children died now than keep suffering like this, a bitter, unguarded cry of a father at the end of his rope. The poverty is so total that there isn't even cow-dung left to smear the floor for the most basic household cleaning. And through it all, his wife carries the weight silently, groaning under the burden without complaint. Tukaram doesn't hide any of this behind pious language, he lets the raw anger and grief stand, showing that real devotion doesn't require pretending suffering away.
मराठी: हा तुकारामांचा गरिबी आणि निराशेबद्दलचा सर्वात कच्चा, प्रामाणिक कबुलीजबाब आहे. ते कडवटपणे विचारतात की हे संकट फक्त माझ्यावरच का कोसळलं, जणू मी कधी न भोगलेला एखादा सुखाचा भागच माझ्यापासून हिरावून घेतला गेला. ते बघतात की सुख इतरांच्या घरी चालत जातं, तर स्वतःची फजिती काही केल्या संपत नाही. निराशेने ते विचारतात, कोणाची बायको मी या संसाराच्या अंतहीन आपत्तींमध्ये ओढली आहे, आणि अजून किती संकटं पार करायची बाकी आहेत. त्यांच्या सर्वात काळ्या क्षणी ते म्हणतात की आताच उपाशी पोरं मेली तर बरं होईल, अशा दुःखाच्या टोकाला पोचलेल्या बापाची ही उघडी, बेधडक आरोळी आहे. गरिबी इतकी टोकाची आहे की घर सारवायला साधं गाईचं शेणही उरलेलं नाही. आणि या सगळ्यात त्यांची पत्नी न कुरकुरता, मुकाट्याने हा भार वाहत राहते, ओझ्याखाली कण्हत राहते. तुकाराम हे सगळं पवित्र भाषेच्या मागे लपवत नाहीत — ते हा कच्चा राग आणि दुःख जसंच्या तसं मांडतात, हे दाखवत की खरी भक्ती दुःख लपवायला भाग पाडत नाही.
Where this applies
- Why-only-to-me? Bitter-irony.
- Others sukha; me fajīta. Contrast.
- No cow-dung for sārava. Bottom-poverty.
- Wife groans under load. Patient-suffering.