Abhanga 1817
True longing for God shows up as wanting solitude more than company, and tears and sleeplessness more than comfort.
The verse
वाळूनियां जन सांडी मज दुरी । करिसील हरी ऐसें कधीं ॥१॥ आठवीन पाय धरूनि अनुताप । वाहे जळ झोंप नाहीं डोळां ॥ध्रु.॥ नावडती जीवा आणीक प्रकार । आवडी ते फार एकांताची ॥२॥ तुका म्हणे ऐसी धरितों वासना । होई नारायणा साई मज ॥३॥
Literal translation
Drying up — people abandon me far — will you do this, Hari, thus, when? Remembering the feet, holding anutāpa — water flows, no sleep in the eyes. Other types don't please the jīva — the great-fondness is for ēkānta. Tuka says: such vāsanā I hold — be my sā'ī, Nārāyaṇa.
Word-by-word gloss
| Marathi | Meaning |
|---|---|
| वाळूनियां जन सांडी मज दुरी | "drying-up (vāḷūniyām = withering / drying away the world) — people abandon me — far" |
| करिसील हरी ऐसें कधीं | "will you do, Hari — thus — when" |
| आठवीन पाय धरूनि अनुताप | "remembering — the feet — holding — anutāpa (regret)" |
| वाहे जळ झोंप नाहीं डोळां | "water flows — no sleep — in the eyes" |
| नावडती जीवा आणीक प्रकार | "don't please — the jīva — other types" |
| आवडी ते फार एकांताची | "the great-fondness — is for ēkānta (solitude)" |
| तुका म्हणे ऐसी धरितों वासना | "Tuka says — such — (I) hold — vāsanā (longing)" |
| होई नारायणा साई मज | "be, Nārāyaṇa — sā'ī (= lord, master) — to me" |
What it means
Yearning-for-ēkānta + tears-and-no-sleep + sā'ī-Nārāyaṇa-petition abhang.
The opening: vāḷūniyām jana sāṇḍī maja durī — karisīla Hari aisē kadhīm — drying up — people abandon me far — will you do this, Hari, thus, when?. Vāḷūniyām = drying-up, withering (= the world's-attachment-to-me drying-up so people no-longer-cling-to-me); sāṇḍī = abandon; durī = far. The bhakta requests that the world's-attachment-to-him be-dried-away so-that-people-leave-him-alone-for-ēkānta-with-Hari. (Striking-anti-fame petition.)
The tears-and-no-sleep line: āṭhavīna pāya dharūni anutāpa — vāhē jaḷa jhōmpa nāhīm ḍōḷām — remembering the feet, holding anutāpa — water flows, no sleep in the eyes. Anutāpa = intense-regret / repentance. Memory-of-Hari's-feet + anutāpa = tears-flow + sleeplessness. (The classical bhakti-yearning-symptom-pair.)
The ēkānta-fondness: nā'aḍatī jīvā āṇīka prakāra — āvaḍī tē phāra ēkāntācī — other types don't please the jīva — the great-fondness is for ēkānta. Other-pleasures don't-please; only-ēkānta (solitude with Hari) is the great-fondness.
The closing: Tukā mhaṇē aiśī dharitōm vāsanā — hō'ī Nārāyaṇā sā'ī maja — Tuka says: such vāsanā I hold — be my sā'ī, Nārāyaṇa. Sā'ī = lord, master. The petition: be-my-master, Nārāyaṇa, in-this-vāsanā-of-mine.
The implicit-message: the bhakta wants the world to dry-away from him so that he can be in ēkānta-with-Hari; he holds-this-vāsanā firmly; he asks Nārāyaṇa to be his sā'ī (master) and grant-this-state.
This abhang has the pure-ekānta-mood — pairs with 1814's seven-fold yearning-similes. Among Tuka's most-tender ekānta-petition abhangs.
[T]
For someone today
For today: drying up — people abandon me far — Hari, will you do this, thus, when?; remembering the feet, holding anutāpa — water flows, no sleep in the eyes; other types don't please the jīva — the great-fondness is for ēkānta; Tuka says — such vāsanā I hold — be my sā'ī, Nārāyaṇa.
Where this applies
- When you feel exhausted by constant social obligations and secretly wish everyone would just leave you alone for a while
- When you lie awake at night thinking about someone or something you love, and the longing itself brings tears
- When achievements, parties, or company that used to excite you suddenly feel empty compared to quiet time alone
- When you catch yourself praying not for more but simply to be left undisturbed with your faith