Abhanga 2240

Tukaram tells God that after years of a formally sealed, still unresolved debt between them, there is no reason left to hold back and speak with hesitant deference.

The verse

Literal translation

What it means

You-drowned-my-rukā + who-holds-back-in-awe-now abhang. Third abhang of the 4-abhang quarrel-cluster (2238-2241).

The drowning-of-coin accusation: kāya sāhatōsī phukā — mājhā buḍavilā rukā — what are you bearing for free — you've drowned my coin. Phukā = for free, gratis. Rukā = small coin, paisā. Buḍavilā = drowned, sunk. What-are-you-bearing-(receiving) for-free? You've-drowned-my-rukā (= my-livelihood, the trade-coin). A possible double-wordplay: buḍavilā echoes the kavitvā-buḍavaṇē (the poetry-drowning); now-the-bhakta-counter-charges that-the-Lord-has-drowned the bhakta's-coin (livelihood, social-standing). The mercantile-Tukārām-the-grain-merchant here-uses-trade-language.

The fastened-debt: rīṇa gharāchē pāngilē — tē na suṭē kāmhīm kēlē — the debt of the house got fastened — it doesn't release, whatever I do. The household-debt got-fastened-(on-me); it-doesn't-release no-matter-what-I-do. (= the debt-to-Viṭhṭhal stays-fastened-no-matter-how-I-try-to-clear-it. Or: the worldly-debt remained-after-I-gave-everything-to-bhakti.)

The four-witnesses oath: chaughāñchiyā matē — ādhīm kharē kēlē hōtē — by four-witnesses' opinion — it was made true earlier. Chaughā = four-(witnesses). By-four-witnesses'-opinion, it was-made-true-earlier. (= the agreement-between-us was-formally-sealed earlier-with-witnesses; you can't-back-out-now.)

The closing — no-more-awe: Tukā mhaṇē yāvarī — ātām bhīḍa kōṇa dharī — Tuka says: on this — who now holds back in awe. Bhīḍa = awe, hesitation, embarrassment. On-this (= given-all-this), who-now would-hold-back in-awe? (= the bhakta-feels-licensed to-speak-without-deference.)

[T]

For someone today

For today: what are you bearing for free — you drowned my rukā; debt of house fastened — doesn't release; by four-witnesses opinion — made true earlier; Tuka says — on this — who now holds back in awe.

Where this applies

• When you feel you have given your all to someone and still feel weighed down by an unpaid debt to them.
• When you keep trying to release yourself from an old obligation but it simply will not let go of you.
• When you remember a promise made long ago in front of witnesses and use it to hold someone accountable now.
• When enough shared history with someone finally gives you the courage to speak to them without polite hesitation.

Related verses

• Abhanga 2374 — Rather than scattering devotion among many lesser deities who demand offerings, Tukaram sa
• Abhanga 2377 — This detailed meditation on Vitthal standing on a brick at Pandharpur, out of love for his
• Abhanga 2387 — Accept whatever life brings with reverence, and place the burden on God rather than carryi
• Abhanga 2402 — For today: happily take rebirths — IF among the Paṇḍharī-Vārkarīs ; Hari-dāsas' company is