Abhanga 2823
Even when you feel unworthy of true closeness to someone you admire, humble service and grateful remembrance are enough to hold onto their kindness.
The verse
नमावे पाय हें माझें उचित । आशीर्वादें हित तुमचिया॥१॥
कृपेचा वोरस न समाये पोटीं । म्हणोनि उफराटीं वचनें हीं ॥ध्रु.॥
तुमची उष्टावळी हें माझें भोजन । झाडावें अंगण केरपुंजे ॥२॥
परि ऐसें पुण्य नाहीं माझें गांठीं । जेणें पडे मिठी पायांसवें ॥३॥
तुका म्हणे राहे आठवण चित्ती । ऐशी कृपा संतीं केली तुम्हीं ॥४॥
Literal translation
Namāve pāya he mājhe uchita — bowing to (your) feet — this is myuchita(fitting); āśīrvāde hita tumchiyā — by yourāśīrvāda(blessings) — (is) myhita(welfare). Krpeñcā vōrasa na samāye pōṭī — thevōrasa(oozing, overflowing) ofkrpā(compassion) does notsamāye(fit) in (my)pōṭī(belly); mhaṇōnī upharāṭīm vachane hīm — therefore these words (come)upharāṭīm(upside-down). Tumacī uṣṭāvaḷī he mājhe bhojana — youruṣṭāvaḷī(leftovers, leftover-food) is mybhojana(meal); jhāḍāve angaṇa kera-puṇje — I willjhāḍāve(sweep) theangaṇa(courtyard), thekera-puṇje(dirt-corner). Parī aise puṇya nāhī mājhe gāṭhī — but suchpuṇyais not in mygāṭhī(pouch); jeṇe paḍē miṭhī pāyām-save — by which themiṭhī(embrace) would fall (be possible) with the feet. Tukā says: rāhe āṭhavaṇa chittī — theāṭhavaṇa(remembrance) stays in (my) chitta; aiśī krpā santīm kelī tumhī — suchkrpā— you sants have done.
What it means
A tender sant-sevā-petition verse. Namāve pāya he mājhe uchita — āśīrvāde hita tumchiyā — bowing to the feet is my uchita — your blessings are my welfare. The opening declaration: my fitting-work is feet-bowing; your blessings are my welfare.
The dhrūpada: krpeñcā vōrasa na samāye pōṭī — mhaṇōnī upharāṭīm vachane hīm — the oozing-overflow of compassion doesn't fit in my belly; therefore these words (come) upside-down. Vōrasa — the oozing-overflow. The compassion-overflow is too-big for the bhakta's belly; the words come out upside-down — meaning, disordered, jumbled (as in 2710's pāya pōṭīm upharāṭē).
The second verse has the striking sant-sevā image: tumacī uṣṭāvaḷī he mājhe bhojana — jhāḍāve angaṇa kera-puṇje — youruṣṭāvaḷī(leftover-food) is my meal; I will sweep the courtyard, the dirt-corner. The bhakta's-sevā: eating leftovers + sweeping the dirt. The uṣṭāvaḷī is the food-eaten-from-already, technically polluted by ordinary-purity-rules — but here it is the bhakta's-chosen-meal. (Compare 2633's ucchiṣṭa-prasāda).
The third verse names the regret: parī aise puṇya nāhī mājhe gāṭhī — jeṇe paḍē miṭhī pāyām-save — but such puṇya is not in my pouch — by which the embrace with the feet would (happen). The honest-confession: I don't have the puṇya-quantity to actually-embrace-the-feet.
The close: rāhe āṭhavaṇa chittī — aiśī krpā santīm kelī tumhī — the remembrance stays in (my) chitta — such compassion you sants have done. The remembrance-of-the-sants stays even without the feet-embrace — this is the santām-cī krpā.
For someone today
A useful tender sant-sevā petition. Bowing to (your) feet — this is my fitting; your blessings — my welfare. The compassion-overflow doesn't fit in my belly — therefore my words come upside-down. Your leftovers are my meal — I will sweep the courtyard, the dirt-corner. But such puṇya is not in my pouch — by which I might embrace the feet. The remembrance stays in (my) chitta — such compassion you sants have done. The verse permits the humble-leftover-food + courtyard-sweeping sevā-stance. And the honest-confession: I don't have the puṇya-quantity to actually embrace the feet — but at least the remembrance stays. The remembrance-as-krpā close is the relief.
Where this applies
- When you're overwhelmed by someone's kindness and struggle to find adequate words to thank them
- When you want to serve someone you admire through humble, unglamorous acts rather than grand gestures
- When you feel you haven't earned the closeness you long for with someone you deeply respect
- When you find comfort simply in remembering someone's goodness, even without direct access to them