Abhanga 2862
Admitting you are accepting respect or service you have not truly earned, on both the spiritual and worldly fronts, is the honest first step toward asking to be corrected.
The verse
पापाची मी राशी । सेवाचोर पायांपाशीं ॥१॥
करा दंड नारायणा । माझ्या मनाची खंडणा ॥ध्रु.॥
जना हातीं सेवा । घेतों लंडपणें देवा ॥२॥
तुझा ना संसार । तुका दोहींकडे चोर ॥३॥
Literal translation
Pāpāñcī mī rāśī — I am arāśī(heap) ofpāpa; sevā-chōra pāyām-pāśī — asevā-chōra(service-thief) at the feet. Karā daṇḍa Nārāyaṇā — inflictdaṇḍa(punishment), Nārāyaṇa; mājhyā manāñcī khaṇḍanā — thekhaṇḍanā(correction, breaking) of my mind. Janā hātī sevā — (taking) service from thejana(people's) hands; ghētōm laṇḍa-paṇe Devā — I take (as if) withlaṇḍa-paṇe(rogue-ness), O Deva. Tujhā nā samsāra — not your (servant), not (your) samsāra; Tukā dōhīm-kaḍe chōra — Tukā is achōra(thief) on both sides.
What it means
A striking 3-verse extreme-confession verse. Pāpāñcī mī rāśī — sevā-chōra pāyām-pāśī — I am a heap of sins — a service-thief at (your) feet. The opening self-naming: sevā-chōra — one who steals (the appearance of) service. He stands-at-the-feet-of-the-Lord under-false-pretenses-of-being-a-servant.
Karā daṇḍa Nārāyaṇā — mājhyā manāñcī khaṇḍanā — inflict punishment, Nārāyaṇa — the correction of my mind. The petition for correction-by-punishment. (Compare 2840's save-save-I-am-lost — both petition for divine-intervention.)
Janā hātī sevā — ghētōm laṇḍa-paṇe Devā — taking service from people's hands — I take (as if) with rogue-ness, O Deva. The honest-confession: I receive sevā from-other-people-(treating-me-as-a-sant) — taking it with laṇḍa-paṇa (rogue-ness, dishonesty). The bhakta is accepting honor as a sant while-not-being-one.
The close: tujhā nā samsāra — Tukā dōhīm-kaḍe chōra — not your (servant), not (your) samsāra — Tukā is a thief on both sides. The final-diagnostic: I am neither a true-servant of yours, nor a true-householder in samsāra — I am a thief on both sides. Failing both spheres.
For someone today
This is a startlingly honest confession. Tuka calls himself a heap of sin, a thief who steals the appearance of service while standing at the Lord's feet. He asks Narayana directly to punish him, to break and correct his mind, because he knows flattery won't fix him. He admits that when people treat him with the honor due to a saint, he accepts it dishonestly, like a rogue taking something he hasn't earned. In the end he confesses the full weight of it: he is no true servant of God, and no true participant in ordinary life either, he is a thief on both sides, failing at both. This is the kind of self-examination that asks for real correction rather than comfort.
मराठी: ही एक विलक्षण प्रामाणिक कबुली आहे. तुकाराम महाराज स्वतःला पापांची रास आणि परमेश्वराच्या चरणी सेवेचे सोंग करणारा चोर म्हणतात. ते नारायणाला थेट विनंती करतात की मला शिक्षा कर, माझ्या मनाला मोडून सुधार, कारण त्यांना माहीत आहे की खुशामत यावर उपाय नाही. लोक त्यांना संताला साजेसा मान देतात, तेव्हा तो मान ते अप्रामाणिकपणे, चोरासारखा, न कमावता स्वीकारतात हे ते कबूल करतात. शेवटी ते पूर्ण सत्य मान्य करतात — ना ते देवाचे खरे सेवक आहेत, ना सामान्य संसाराचे खरे भागीदार — ते दोन्ही बाजूंनी चोर आहेत, दोन्हीकडे अपयशी. ही अशी आत्मपरीक्षा आहे जी सांत्वन नव्हे तर खरी सुधारणा मागते.
Where this applies
- When people praise you or treat you as wiser or more virtuous than you actually feel you are, and you accept it anyway.
- When you realize you are not fully committed to either your ideals or your ordinary responsibilities, and you are coasting on both.
- When you want to ask for real correction rather than comfort, because you know flattery will not fix you.
- When you catch yourself performing a role for others' approval that does not match your inner honesty.