Abhanga 1053
Tukaram confesses that desire and anger are still alive in his body, even while he speaks soft, gentle words on the outside. He admits he does not actually know how he has become worthy to stand at God's feet, Pandurang, and that this uncertainty troubles him. He notices that saints can quote scripture and puranic testimony about what devotion should look like, but his own mind has not become that pure just by hearing it repeated. So he asks God directly to bring him into real experience, not secondhand assurance, and to show him what is true and real for himself. This is permission to be honest that your inner state does not match your outer calm, and to ask for your own direct experience rather than settling for what others say should be true of you.
The verse
काम क्रोध माझे जीताती शरीरीं । कोवळें तें वरी बोलतसें ॥१॥ कैसा सरतां जालों तुझ्या पायीं । पांडुरंगा कांहीं न कळे हें ॥ध्रु.॥ पुराणींची ग्वाही वदतील संत । तैसें नाहीं चित्त शुद्ध जालें ॥२॥ तुका म्हणे मज आणूनि अनुभवा । दाखवीं हें देवा साच खरें ॥३॥
Literal translation
Kāma-krōdha — jītātī — śarīra — kōvaḷē — varī. Saratām — Pāṇḍuranga — don't know. Purāṇic gvāhī — chitta śuddha — not. Tuka says: anubhava — sāca kharē.
मराठी: काम-क्रोध माझे शरीरीं जीतातीं — परि वरी कोवळें बोलतसें. कैसा तुझ्या पायीं सरतां जालों? — Pāṇḍurangā, हें कांहीं न कळे. पुराणीची ग्वाही संत वदतील — तैसें माझें चित्त शुद्ध नाहीं जालें. Tuka म्हणे: मज अनुभवा आणूनि — Dēvā, हें साच-खरें दाखवीं.
Word-by-word gloss
| Marathi | Meaning |
|---|---|
| काम क्रोध माझे जीताती शरीरीं | "kāma-krōdha — jītātī — śarīra" |
| कोवळें तें वरी बोलतसें | "kōvaḷē — varī" |
| कैसा सरतां जालों तुझ्या पायीं | "saratām" |
| पांडुरंगा कांहीं न कळे हें | "Pāṇḍuranga — don't know" |
| पुराणींची ग्वाही वदतील संत | "purāṇic gvāhī" |
| तैसें नाहीं चित्त शुद्ध जालें | "chitta śuddha — not" |
| मज आणूनि अनुभवा | "anubhava" |
| दाखवीं हें देवा साच खरें | "sāca kharē" |
What it means
A kāma-and-krōdha-live-in-my-body-but-on-the-surface-I-speak-tender-words-how-have-I-become-worthy-at-your-feet-Pāṇḍuranga-this-I-don't-know-the-saints-will-give-puranic-testimony-but-my-mind-has-not-become-so-pure-bring-me-into-experience-show-this-to-me-Dēva-true-and-real abhang. Bring-me-into-anubhava-true-and-real register. The outer-sweet-inner-rough self-confession. Four claims:
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काम-क्रोध-शरीर — कोवळें-वरी. Kāma-krōdha-live-tender-words-on-surface-claim. Kāma-krōdha live (jītātī) in my śarīra;but on the varī (surface, outside), I speak kōvaḷē (tender, sweet) words. (Theouter-sweet-inner-rough split.)
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सरतां-तुझ्या-पाय — न-कळे. Don't-know-how-worthy-claim. How have I becomesaratām (worthy, passed as worthy) at your pāya?;Pāṇḍurangā, this I don't know.
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पुराण-ग्वाही-संत — चित्त-शुद्ध-नाहीं. Saints-testimony-chitta-not-pure-claim. Thesamtaswill givepurāṇicgvāhī (puranic testimony, scriptural witness); but mychittahas not become sośuddha. (Saints can quote scripture aboutwhat bhakti looks like — but my own chitta hasn't yet matched.)
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Tuka: अनुभव — साच-खरें-दाखवीं. Bring-me-into-anubhava-show-true-and-real-claim. Tuka says: bring me intoanubhava (experience); show this to me, Dēvā,sāca kharē (true-and-real). (Don't just have the saintstestify—let me experience it.)
[T]
For someone today
Tukaram confesses that desire and anger are still alive in his body, even while he speaks soft, gentle words on the outside. He admits he does not actually know how he has become worthy to stand at God's feet, Pandurang, and that this uncertainty troubles him. He notices that saints can quote scripture and puranic testimony about what devotion should look like, but his own mind has not become that pure just by hearing it repeated. So he asks God directly to bring him into real experience, not secondhand assurance, and to show him what is true and real for himself. This is permission to be honest that your inner state does not match your outer calm, and to ask for your own direct experience rather than settling for what others say should be true of you.
मराठी: तुकाराम महाराज कबूल करतात की काम आणि क्रोध अजूनही त्यांच्या शरीरात जिवंत आहेत, तरी बाहेरून ते कोमल, गोड शब्द बोलत असतात. ते मान्य करतात की आपण देवाच्या, पांडुरंगाच्या चरणी कसे पात्र झालो हे त्यांना खरोखर कळत नाही, आणि ही अनिश्चितता त्यांना अस्वस्थ करते. ते सांगतात की संत पुराणांतील दाखले देऊन भक्ती कशी असावी हे सांगू शकतात, पण नुसतं ऐकून त्यांचं स्वतःचं मन तितकं शुद्ध झालेलं नाही. म्हणून ते देवाला थेट विनंती करतात की मला खऱ्या अनुभवात आणा, दुसऱ्याच्या साक्षीवर विसंबून राहायला नको, आणि जे खरं आहे ते मला स्वतःला दाखवा. यातून शिकवण अशी की आपलं आतलं खरं रूप बाहेरच्या शांततेशी जुळत नसेल तर ते मान्य करण्यात लाज नाही, आणि इतरांनी सांगितलेल्या गोष्टींवर समाधान न मानता स्वतःचा अनुभव मागण्याचा हक्क आहे.
Where this applies
- Outer-inner-split. Kōvaḷē-varī.
- Don't-know-worthy. Saratām.
- Testimony-vs-chitta. Gvāhī.
- Anubhava-real. Sāca-kharē.