Abhanga 1876
Distance from someone who is supposed to be close to you hurts far more than distance from a stranger ever could.
The verse
कवणांशीं भांडों कोण माझें साहे । कोण मज आहे तुजविण ॥१॥ धरिलें उदास दुरदुरांतरें । सांडी एकसरें केली माझी ॥ध्रु.॥ आइकोन माझे नाइकसी बोल । देखोनियां खोळ बुंथी घेसी ॥२॥ तुका म्हणे एके गांवींची वसती । म्हणऊनि खंती वाटे देवा ॥३॥
Literal translation
With whom shall I quarrel? — who is my support? — who is for me, except you? You held aloof at far-far-distances — abandoned me at once. Hearing my words you don't heed — seeing (me), you put on a cloak. Tuka says: the same-village residency — therefore I feel regret, deva.
Word-by-word gloss
| Marathi | Meaning |
|---|---|
| कवणांशीं भांडों कोण माझें साहे | "with whom shall I quarrel — who is my support" |
| कोण मज आहे तुजविण | "who is for me — except you" |
| धरिलें उदास दुरदुरांतरें | "you held aloof (udāsa) — at far-far-distances" |
| सांडी एकसरें केली माझी | "(you) abandoned — at-once — (me)" |
| आइकोन माझे नाइकसी बोल | "hearing my words — you don't heed" |
| देखोनियां खोळ बुंथी घेसी | "seeing (me) — you put on a kunthī (cloak / disguise)" |
| तुका म्हणे एके गांवींची वसती | "Tuka says — the same-village residency" |
| म्हणऊनि खंती वाटे देवा | "therefore — I feel khanti (regret) — deva" |
What it means
Same-village-but-aloof + you-disguise-yourself abhang.
The opening: kavaṇāñśīm bhāṇḍōm kōṇa mājhē sāhē — kōṇa maja āhē tujavīṇa — with whom shall I quarrel? — who is my support? — who is for me, except you?. The bhakta has-no-other-recourse.
The aloofness-line: dharilē udāsa dura-durāntarē — sāṇḍī ēka-sarē kēlī mājhī — you held aloof at far-far-distances — abandoned (me) at once. Udāsa = aloof, indifferent, withdrawn; sāṇḍī = abandonment. The Lord-has-pulled-back-to-far-distances and-abandoned the bhakta at-once.
The disguise-line: āikōn mājhē nā'ikasī bōla — dēkhōniyām khōḷa bunthī ghēsī — hearing my words, you don't heed — seeing (me), you put on a cloak. Khōḷa bunthī = covering / cloak / disguise. You-pretend-not-to-hear, and-when-you-see-me-coming you-cover-yourself-up to-avoid-recognition.
The closing-regret: Tukā mhaṇē ēkē gāmvīñcī vasatī — mhaṇa'ūni khantī vāṭē devā — Tuka says: the same-village residency — therefore I feel khanti (regret), deva. Khanti = deep regret, sadness. The bhakta and the Lord live in-the-same-village (= Pandhari, or the bhakta's-heart) — that's-why-the-aloofness-causes-regret. (= if-they-were-strangers, the-aloofness-would-be-acceptable; but-as-village-mates, the-cold-shoulder is heart-breaking.)
This abhang's same-village-but-aloof image is one of the most-tender-painful in the gatha — the proximity-makes-the-distance-more-painful.
[T]
For someone today
For today: with whom shall I quarrel? — who is my support? — who is for me, except you?; you held aloof at far-far-distances — abandoned me at once; hearing my words, you don't heed — seeing me, you put on a cloak; Tuka says — same-village residency — therefore I feel khanti, deva.
Where this applies
- When someone close to you, a friend, family member, or your sense of God, seems to have gone cold or distant.
- When you feel unheard even though you're pouring out your honest feelings to someone who matters to you.
- When the pain of a relationship comes precisely from how close you once were, not from indifference.
- When you need permission to voice hurt and disappointment honestly instead of hiding it.