Abhanga 3514
Even when your devotion feels more like performance than substance, you can still ask humbly to belong among the devoted, even at the margins, and let that sincerity begin to undo old harm.
The verse
कैचें भांडवल खरा हातीं भाव । कळवळ्यानें माव दावीतसें ॥१॥
आतां माझा अंत नको सर्वजाणा । पाहों नारायणा निवडूनि ॥ध्रु.॥
संतांचें उच्छष्टि मागिले पंगती । करावें संगती लागे ऐसें ॥२॥
तुका म्हणे आलों दावूनि विश्वास । संचित तें नास पावे ऐसें ॥३॥
Literal translation
What-bhāṇḍavala — just-māva-through-emotion. Don't-seek-my-end-sarva-jāṇa — sort-it-Nārāyaṇa. Sant-uchchhiṣṭi-from-back-rows — let-me-have-such-sangati. Tukā: came-showing-viśvāsa — let-samchita-be-destroyed.
What it means
A 3-verse self-confession-petition. I have no real capital — just emotional-display; don't seek my limit; let me have sant's leavings from the back-rows; let samchita be destroyed.
For someone today
Tukaram makes a humble confession here: he admits he has no real spiritual wealth, no true devotion firmly in hand, only an emotional display that can look like performance. He asks the all-knowing Narayana not to measure him by his true limits, but to sort things out on his own. All he asks for is a place among the leftovers of the saints, seated even in the back rows, just to belong to their company. He closes by saying he has come showing whatever trust he has, hoping that his accumulated wrongs can be undone by it.
मराठी: तुकाराम इथे एक नम्र कबुली देतात, ते मान्य करतात की त्यांच्याजवळ खरी आध्यात्मिक संपत्ती नाही, हातात खरी भक्ती नाही, फक्त भावनांचा एक देखावा आहे जो कदाचित नाटकासारखा वाटू शकतो. ते सर्वज्ञ नारायणाला विनंती करतात की माझी खरी झीज तपासू नकोस, तूच हे सगळे सांभाळ. ते फक्त इतकीच मागणी करतात की संतांच्या उष्ट्यातला वाटा, अगदी मागच्या पंगतीतला असला तरी, त्यांना मिळावा, त्यांच्या सोबतीत राहता यावे. शेवटी ते म्हणतात की जो काही विश्वास त्यांच्याजवळ आहे तो दाखवत ते आले आहेत, आणि त्यामुळे त्यांचे साठलेले पाप नष्ट व्हावे अशी आशा करतात.
Where this applies
- When you doubt whether your faith or effort is genuine and fear you are only performing
- When you feel unworthy of a place among truly devoted people but still want to belong, even at the margins
- When you ask for grace instead of insisting you have earned it
- When you show up with whatever sincerity you have, hoping it is enough to start real change