Abhanga 3862
When exhaustion and old wounds finally reach the brim, it is enough to ask simply for shelter, without needing your worth or effort to be judged first.
The verse
बहु या प्रपंचें भोगविल्या खाणी । टाकोनियां मनीं ठेविला सीण ॥१॥
आतां पायांपाशीं लपवावें देवा । नको पाहूं सेवा भक्ती माझी ॥ध्रु.॥
बहु भय वाटे एकाच्या बोभाटें । आली घायवटे फिरोनियां ॥२॥
तुका म्हणे सिगे भरूं आलें माप । वियोग संताप जाला तुझा ॥३॥
Literal translation
Prapancha-suffered-in-khāṇī — set-aside — only-śīṇa-kept. Hide-me-at-feet — don't-look-at-sevā-bhakti. Much-bhaya-by-one-bōbhāṭa — wound-came-around. Tukā: māpa-peak-coming — your-viyōga-santāpa.
What it means
A 3-verse refuge-prayer. Much was endured in the world-mines of becoming — cast aside in mind, only the exhaustion was kept. Now hide me near your feet, Deva — don't look at my service or devotion (i.e., they are inadequate). Great fear from a single shout — the wound came around again. The measure is brimming — your separation has become tormenting. The image sigē bharūm ālēm māpa (the measure-coming-to-the-brim) is the eleventh-hour image — endurance has run out.
For someone today
Tukaram describes being worn down by the endless grind of ordinary life, so much that he has stopped counting what he has endured, and all that is left is exhaustion. He asks God to simply hide him close to his feet, and pleads that God not judge his devotion or service too closely, because he knows it falls short. A single blow of fear was enough to bring back an old wound all over again. He says the cup of his endurance is now full to the brim, and the ache of feeling separated from God has become almost too much to bear.
मराठी: तुकाराम रोजच्या जगण्याच्या रगाड्याने इतके थकून गेल्याचे सांगतात की त्यांनी काय काय सोसले हे मोजणेही सोडून दिले आहे, आणि उरला आहे तो फक्त थकवा. ते देवाला विनंती करतात की मला फक्त आपल्या पायांशी लपवून घ्या, आणि माझी सेवा-भक्ती फार बारकाईने तपासू नका, कारण ती अपुरी आहे हे त्यांना ठाऊक आहे. भीतीचा एकच धक्का जुनी जखम पुन्हा उघडून टाकायला पुरेसा ठरला. ते म्हणतात की त्यांच्या सहनशक्तीचे माप आता काठोकाठ भरले आहे, आणि देवापासून वेगळे राहिल्याची व्यथा असह्य होत चालली आहे.
Where this applies
- When you feel completely worn down by the daily grind and have nothing left but exhaustion
- When you want someone to simply shelter you rather than evaluate whether you deserve it
- When a small setback reopens an old wound and floods you with fear all over again
- When you feel you have reached the absolute limit of what you can endure