Abhanga 4089
When longing for real connection and guidance becomes a restless burden, admit you don't know your own good and simply ask to be drawn close and held with love.
The verse
संतांचा पढीयावो कैशापरि लाहो । नामाचा आठवो कैसा राहे ॥१॥
हे चि थोर चिंता लागली मनासी । निजतां निद्रेसी न लगे डोळा ॥ध्रु.॥
जेवितां जेवणीं न लगे गोड धड । वाटतें काबाड विषयसुख ॥२॥
ऐसिया संकटीं पाव कृपानिधी । लावीं संतपदीं प्रेमभावें ॥३॥
तुका म्हणे आम्हीं नेणों कांहीं हित । तुजविण अनाथ पांडुरंगा ॥४॥
Literal translation
How-attain-santas-paḍhī — how-Nāma-āṭhavō-stays. Thōra-chinta — no-sleep-in-eyes. Eating-no-gōḍa — viṣaya-sukha-burden. In-sankaṭa-krpā-niḍhi — attach-santa-pada-prema-bhāva. Tukā: don't-know-hita — anātha-without-you.
What it means
A 4-verse seeking-santa-love prayer. How is the santas' love to be gained? How does Name's memory stay? This great worry has settled on my mind; while sleeping, the eye doesn't catch sleep. Eating, the food doesn't taste sweet-and-fresh; viṣaya-joy feels like a heavy burden. In such distress, come, ocean-of-compassion; attach me at the santa-pada with love-state. We know nothing of our welfare — without you, orphan, Pāṇḍuranga. The body-symptoms (sleeplessness, no taste, viṣaya-as-burden) describe the post-bhakti-loss-of-worldly-appetite state.
For someone today
Tukaram admits how deeply he longs to be truly loved by good, saintly people, and how badly he wants to keep remembering the divine name without losing it. That longing weighs on him so heavily that he can't sleep at night, and even food loses its taste; the pleasures that used to satisfy him now feel like a burden instead of a comfort. In that state of restlessness, he doesn't try to fix it alone, he simply asks for help, praying to be drawn close to good people and held there with love. He admits plainly that he doesn't know what's truly good for him and feels lost without that guidance and connection.
मराठी: तुकाराम प्रामाणिकपणे कबूल करतात की चांगल्या, संतवृत्तीच्या माणसांचे खरे प्रेम मिळावे अशी त्यांना किती तीव्र आस आहे, आणि नामाचे स्मरण कधीच सुटू नये अशी किती तळमळ आहे. ही आस इतकी जड आहे की रात्री झोपच येत नाही, आणि अन्नालाही चव उरत नाही; जी सुखे आधी समाधान देत होती ती आता आरामाऐवजी ओझ्यासारखी वाटतात. या अस्वस्थतेत ते स्वतःहून काही सोडवण्याचा प्रयत्न करत नाहीत, ते फक्त मदत मागतात, चांगल्या माणसांच्या जवळ नेले जावे आणि प्रेमाने तिथेच धरून ठेवले जावे अशी प्रार्थना करतात. ते स्पष्टपणे कबूल करतात की त्यांना स्वतःचे खरे हित कळत नाही आणि त्या मार्गदर्शनाशिवाय, त्या नात्याशिवाय ते हरवल्यासारखे वाटतात.
Where this applies
- When you deeply long for real connection with good people but don't know how to reach it
- When anxiety about staying on a good path keeps you up at night or takes away your appetite
- When pleasures that used to satisfy you now feel empty or like a burden instead
- When you feel lost about your own true good and need to simply ask for help rather than solve it alone