Abhanga 4189
Honest criticism can act like free soap that cleans away your faults, but the habitual critic collects all that dirt in themselves and pays a heavy price for it.
The verse
निंदक तो परउपकारी । काय वणूप त्याची थोरी । जे रजकाहुनि भले परि । सर्व गुणें आगळा ॥१॥
नेघे मोल धुतो फुका । पाप वरच्यावरि देखा । करी साधका । शुद्ध सरते तिहीं लोकीं ॥ध्रु.॥
मुखसंवदणी सांगते । अवघें सांटविलें तेथें । जिव्हा साबण निरुतें । दोष काढी जन्माचे ॥२॥
तया ठाव यमपुरीं । वास करणें अघोरीं । त्यासी दंडण करी । तुका म्हणे न्हाणी ते ॥३॥
Literal translation
Nindaka-is-para-upakārī — what-thōri to-describe. Better-than-rajaka — all-guṇa-extra. No-fee — washes-free. Pāpa-visible-on-top — makes-sādhaka-shuddha-3-worlds. Mukha-samvadaṇī-stores-all — jihvā-is-soap removes-janma-doṣa. His-place-Yamapurī-aghōra — Tukā-punishes-in-n'hāṇī.
What it means
THE canonical 3-verse nindaka-praise text. The fault-finder is a benefactor-of-others; what greatness can I describe of him? Better than a washerman, with all qualities extra. Takes no fee, washes for free; the sin is visible on top so he can get at it. He makes the sādhaka pure and respected in the three worlds. His snout-mouth tells (all) — everything stored there; his tongue is truly the soap that removes birth's defects. (But) his place is in Yamapurī, his stay in the terrible hells — Tukā says, he gives him punishment in this very washing-place. The conceit: the nindaka-washerman-of-the-sādhaka does a real upakāra — by his criticism, the sādhaka's pāpa surfaces and is washed away by the nindaka's tongue-as-soap. But the closing twist is severe: the washerman himself collects all the doṣa in his mouth and so goes to Yamapurī. Pair with 4135 (anti-empty-kīrtana).
For someone today
Tukārām gives an unexpected compliment to the person who criticizes you, calling them a real benefactor, better even than a washerman, because they point out your faults for free and bring what is wrong with you out into the open where it can finally be cleaned. Their tongue works like soap, scrubbing away flaws built up over a lifetime, and leaves you purer and more respected. But then comes the sharp turn: the critic collects all that dirt in their own mouth, and for that habit they end up paying a heavy price themselves. The lesson has two sides, learn to receive honest criticism as a hidden gift rather than an insult, but also recognize that making a habit of tearing others down quietly poisons the person doing it.
मराठी: तुकाराम तुमच्यावर टीका करणाऱ्याला अनपेक्षितपणे प्रशंसा देतात, त्याला खरा उपकारकर्ता म्हणतात, धोब्यापेक्षाही चांगला, कारण तो तुमचे दोष फुकट दाखवतो आणि तुमच्यातील चूक उघड करतो जिथे ती शेवटी स्वच्छ करता येते. त्याची जीभ साबणासारखी काम करते, जन्मभराचे दोष घासून काढते, आणि तुम्हाला अधिक शुद्ध व आदरणीय बनवते. पण मग एक तीक्ष्ण पलटी येते, टीकाकार ती सगळी घाण स्वतःच्या तोंडात साठवून घेतो, आणि त्या सवयीची मोठी किंमत त्याला स्वतःलाच मोजावी लागते. यातून दुहेरी धडा मिळतो, प्रामाणिक टीका अपमान न मानता लपलेली देणगी म्हणून स्वीकारायला शिकावे, पण दुसऱ्यांना सतत खाली ओढण्याची सवय टीका करणाऱ्यालाच आतून विषारी बनवते हेही लक्षात ठेवावे.
Where this applies
- When someone honestly points out your flaws and it stings, but their criticism actually helps you improve
- When you catch yourself gossiping about or tearing down others and wonder what that habit costs you
- When you want to reframe an unwelcome critic as someone doing you an unintentional service
- When you notice a habitual fault-finder seems to be poisoned by their own constant negativity